pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Randomize
