we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
