The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
