You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize
