i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
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