i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
Are we in a gay sports bar?
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
My dad just said "fuck circus"
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
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