Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
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