Taylor Swift is so right about you.
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
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