Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
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