Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
True strength comes from lack of pants
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
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