We named our party play list daddy issues
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Randomize
