Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize
