I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
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