Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
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