Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
Randomize
