: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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