Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
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