Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize