One girl and one boy is just not enough.
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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