Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize