It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
I think I just shit out all my problems.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize