I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
Randomize