where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
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