So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
