It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
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He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
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Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
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