All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
I just found puke in my bra..
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize
