I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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