This girl is more easily done than said...
I wanna passion pit in your ass
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
You told the bartender at least five times that you were naming your son "Jagermeister" but you would use the bartender's name "Fernando" as his middle name. You were drunk.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize