If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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