whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Randomize
