Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
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