Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
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