"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
