Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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