i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
