I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
i think im in europe. pls send help
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
Randomize
