I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Randomize
