There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
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