when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
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