Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
I love you.
Bad choice
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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