And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
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