By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
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Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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