is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
You were upset that she was flirting with your boyfriend so I thought the best game plan was to show her my boobs and get her to make out with me instead. I am the greatest friend on absinthe.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
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