Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
Randomize