I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Randomize
