Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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