using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
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