i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
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