At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
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