Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
