I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Randomize
